Within your messages on the right-hand side (as shown below), you have the option to give feedback.

Clicking on that gives you this…

Now, I didn’t want to rate the last person I went on a date with and I couldn’t find the profile of the other, so I rated a guy that had been bothering me and had a fish as his profile picture, thinking that I probably wasn’t going to damage his chances and wanting to see what would happen.

The only thing that did happen was I was thanked for leaving feedback. I’m not sure how this information is going to be used. I sincerely hope it isn’t public and is just used as a way of letting someone down gentle of generally giving them feedback.

Also, it might be worth noting that I am currently working on a site specifically for online dating content as I’ve decided that I’d rather have it elsewhere. So, keep your eyes peeled for that site coming soon…

Well, you need to be getting as much information as possible during the house selling process in order to make decisions on price and negotiations.

Stats

I’m always hungry for stats. I’m a stat girl. Get stats! I asked for web statistics on my property compared to other similar properties. I didn’t get them, but I wanted them on a weekly basis. It’s quick, easy and definitely possible for your estate agent to get hold of these. You want to know:

• How many people are looking at your listing both on aggregator sites (Zoopla, Rightmove – this information is available to your agent). Low views indicate either your listing isn’t showing in the right results or the lead paragraph/photos aren’t enticing people to click for more info.
• How many people are requesting information about your property from these sites. A low ratio of views to requests suggests there is something wrong with your listing. Either it’s turning people off or the wrong people are finding it.
• How many people are viewing your property on their site and how do these figures compare to those of other similar properties on the market. You need this to ascertain how your listing is performing comparably.

Market News

Your estate agent should be able to give you information about the market in general, whether this be in terms of current peaks and troughs, how national trends have affected the area you’re selling in and how seasonality can affect your type of property. This is useful to know as it may help determine when to drop your house price and whether to put your house on the marketing at all at the moment.

For example, our house was in Cardiff, which has been less impacted by the economy and property has better held it’s price, however, our house was prime real estate for the student rental market, which does affect when people would be most interested in it.

You’re estate agent should also be able to keep you abreast of recent house sales in the area.

Viewer Information

Having as much information as possible on the viewers allows you to understand the market you’re appealing to.

• Families? Then you need to make your house look like a home.
• Rental market? Then you need to demonstrate how the house could achieve maximum income, for example, we used a couple of the reception rooms as bedrooms and rented them out and this set up remained during the sales process.

If you can find out their financial situation e.g. cash buyer, have a property to sell, etc. this can also help you with negotiations. We sold our house at a slightly lower price than we would have wanted to a cash buyer with no chain, because there was less risk of it falling through and went through quicker than someone with a chain.

Feedback on Viewings

For me, this was the most important piece of information but it’s what our estate agent struggled with most. After every single viewing I wanted feedback from the estate agent regarding how the viewing had gone, what the viewers had thought and why they didn’t want it. I also wanted to know if it was their first, second, third viewing, etc.

Now, I was selling my house, which was owned between myself and a friend. The estate agency was run by a father and son. We found that between the two of us we were receiving conflicting information from the this father and son duo, which was frustrating, to say the least.

Anyway, by obtaining this feedback you can again understand whether or not you should drop your price and whether or not the current advertising is appealing to the right people.

So, there you go. If you have any tips on how to get the best out of your estate agent, I would love to hear them. Just leave a comment below.

Notes: The author sold a house in February 2013 and is writing from personal experience.

But why, oh why does Karin Herzog (cosmetics company that I can’t afford) have one on her unsubscribe from emails page? I can just stick the emails in my spam folder if she’d rather, but I’m pretty sure that has a negative impact on future emails sent if they end up marked as spam.

Come on Karin, let’s not make things harder than they need to be.

We sold our house!

First up you need to get your listing sorted. For that, photos will need to be taken.

Tidy the house

Clear up your house. Remove clutter, but don’t make it look too sparse. People like to be able see how their things look in the house, but don’t appear to like it looking bare because it doesn’t look like a home.

Check the photos

Check the photos before they go live. If you’re not happy with them, get them done again. They’re to sell your house, so ensure you’re happy with them.

Check the spec

Make sure you’re happy with the specification before it goes live. We ended up rewriting ours ourselves after a couple of weeks. As well as making sure the information is accurate, consider the following:

• What’s in the top few lines of text? This is what will be shown in the search results on sites like RightMove. You’re probably wondering what should be in here. Well, when we first had our spec written, it had information at the top about the local amenities. Given the way people use websites like RightMove and search by area, they are probably already aware of the local amenities, therefore the top paragraph needs to have key distinguishing features of the house in it e.g. 2 bathrooms, new kitchen, large garden, etc.
• Next up, improvements made to the house should be listed. Potential buyers have access to historical house purchase prices on site like Zoopla, so they can find out how much you paid initially. We’re in a house price slump, so if you’re asking the same or more than you paid for your house, you need to define what justifies this, i.e. what work and improvements have been done. Has the local area improved?
• Do you live in a good rental area? You might like to specify potential rental income so people can get an idea of how much they can earn from your property if it’s bought as an investment.

Check the location

Yes, ours was wrong, meaning that for the first week on the market our house was showing up in results several roads over, then it was positioned on the road perpendicular to ours.

Check where your advert is showing

Just have a quick look on all the main sites you’d expect to see your house promoted on. These include:

www.rightmove.co.uk
www.zoopla.co.uk

As well as the estate agents own website (seems obvious, but trust me, you really need to check it)

So there you go. You should have a pretty nifty and accessible listing for your property now.

But what now? You need to keep managing your Estate Agent now your house is officially on the market and that’s my next post…

Fish of the week
BARRACUDA

Hello again. Back for more of my PlentyOfFish messages and responses. Well, here they are…

As ever, prospective employers, you are requested to take a look over here.

This week (or whatever time period has passed):

The Guy That Didn’t Get / Ignored My Sarcasm

I do try and reply to everyone, but some people make it hard and I get bored, so then this happens:

 Him: Hi there, how are you? X

Me: You’re open a can of worms with that opener. Do you want to try something less adventurous?

Him: Well you do have great boobs

Note, that’s my own fault for my headline: “Smart, funny, great boobs!” You can see my profile here.

The Quick Conversation

Him: Hey how are you x

Let’s just ignore the lack of punctuation. I’ve had this kind of message a few times and following my house rule number one, everyone gets a response, but I’m lazy with lazy people.

Me: Alright

Him: OK then…

Me: Cool. Done.

Him: trying to make conversation dm… Leave you to it

Well, that told me. I don’t even know what the ‘dm’ bit is about, but I don’t think we have a future together. Another one bites the dust.

More Laziness

Him: good afternoon x

Me: Having much luck with that killer opener?

Him: was it bad. sorry.. how r u x

I don’t really have anything else to add to this one.

The Apparently Persistent One

This guy claims to have messaged me before. I don’t believe he has, though I’m kind of intrigued by his tactics. He’s banking on the fact that I won’t go back and check my old messages, though actually, if he had messaged me before, the previous message would show up above the new one. Anyway, is he working the guilt angle? What do you think?

Him: Hi I’m XXXX, nice to meet you .. Would you fancy chattin with me? I did message ya before so I’m kinda hoping you didn’t get it or sumthin so there might be a chance you get back to this one lol.. Anyhow.. I’m from XXXX, work full time, used to teach snow board, travelled much, few tattoos, they all tell a tale about me..I got a magic Piercin lol.. Love music, lived France and New York now I’m back home.. Your pics are bloody fantastic, hmm, I bet you a £10 you won’t get back

Me: I responded, but you can give the tenner to a charity of your choice.

A magic piercing? Huh? I…um…I’m not going to comment any further on that. It was noted.

So, there are my messages for another week. More next week, when I’ll try ease off on the sarcasm and try and be a little kinder.

Mine are as follows:

1. Everyone Deserves A Response

This isn’t technically true. Some people would have made a better impression if they just sent a happy doodle of an owl, but for now, it’s my rule. So whether it’s an essay or just an emoticon, you’ll get something from me. There are no clauses about tact as part of this rule though, sadly for some.

2. Teach & Educate

People are on this site to find love (or attention or sex). I feel it is my duty to let them know where they are going wrong. Whether they admit it or not, some people will take your advice and we can all go away a little enriched from the experience.

3. No Kisses…

…Unless I’d actually give you a kiss. I’m not massively tactile, so a peck on the cheek is a little too intimate for me with someone I don’t know.

4. I Will Not Add You On Facebook

I tell men I won’t add them on Facebook because I work in Social Media, but really it’s because I just don’t want to. It’s odd to add prospective dates, it’s too intimate and there are things on there that a potential match should just not see prior to meeting.

5. Finally…

…If you send me a picture of your penis, rule 1 still applies and I will be disparaging of it. I told one guy that his looked sad and dusty.

You can read about what the challenge entails here, but I’ve put the exercises below as a reminder.

The Work Out

It’s for sets of this:

I’ve done my workout everyday, even when I’ve been in Kenya (check the travel blog), though I’ve missed a few days due to being in transit, being tired or being hungover.

What I’ve liked about this work out is that I don’t need any equipment as it’s a body weight work out and it’s relatively quick; I stick on an episode of New Girl and I’m done by the end of it.

I did have to take out the reverse lunges as they were making my knees click, which I didn’t think was healthy. I hated the planks, I got used to the squats and I actually really enjoyed the push ups.

The Results

Well, I’ve lost weight being in Kenya because I have a very different diet out here, but I’ve noticed my bum and arms are more toned. I think I’ll try and keep this up because it’s rather low effort and I don’t do any other toning exercise.

I haven’t done any cardio for most of May, so I’m looking forward to incorporating that in to the toning. My attitude towards food has really changed on my Kenyan diet though. I’m going to be more conscious of the amount I eat, when I eat and what I snack on. I don’t actually need that much food to feel satisfied all day.

I’m looking forward to weighing myself when I get home. Not because I’m that fussed on the scales, but just to log the affects of being away. I also have a backless dress I reckon might fit now, so I’ll be trying that on too.

Try out Fitocracy. It might be the motivation you need.

Featured Fish -
UNICORN FISH
(yes, it’s an actual thing)

Hello you! Thanks for swinging by. Firstly, I just want to thank everyone that has tweeted, Facebooked and emailed me about yesterday’s post on Online Dating. You’ve all made me giggle.

Secondly, on to business. One special email I received this week was from a friend regarding yesterday’s post. It contained a response a friend of hers had received regarding her dating profile (yeah, a friend of a friend, rather convoluted, but stay with me).

I can’t really add much more than that – see it for yourself. I have rewritten it to try and make sense of it. You can see the original at the bottom if you’d like some kind of word jumble to decipher. It’s pretty long, but worth persevering. Oh, and it all gets a little bit sexual, so prepare yourself for some graphic imagery.

Translation / Re-imagination of this literary masterpiece

It’s difficult to interpret the actual intonation behind this with little guidance from effective punctuation, but I’ve had a go.

I am looking for a girl like you. Answer my message and make my day, month, year. And I was with the one with the pure, like milk, skin and the red bottle top lips. Angel skin angel, you should only drink waters and eat grapes. And she, yes she is the one like oyster coral, she opens her shell so I can feel her pearl. Her lips like colourful oysters, open so tongue can catch you girl. Yes me, yes I, like unicorn, and I am the one like unicorn, with my eyes to the ground and my horn to the sky, in line with the moon in order to feel the pull of you in sexual floods and tides. And with the power of my horn, I will pull me an oyster coral.

Mermaid from the sea lay with me, as you do not have feet, you have flaps and fins, and I will keep you wet, so your fins can breathe. Believe, my home is in heaven, a cloud in the sky. On the cloud is a present, a pleasant surprise, a necklace of constellation stars. Your stars are eternally glittering forever. My heart shows external passion, humid like the dessert. Come to me my angel fairy girl, like sea to river, so we can flow with the wind, on trips to finds star dust; a must. Your hair surfs in the wind in the field. As your hair drops like a rope hanging from heavens her abode [I can’t fathom that bit, sorry]. Your diamond earrings twinkle is the guide house to my yacht. See me not, as my horse has done me well. As we sail into the moon rise, on her back, I lay like mold.  She swims, I hold on to main, though she slept on silver trays, on waves, brave.

Now the stars are at their brightest and your earring is at its most reflective. Now shine, shine angel girl, shine with the moon and stars. And if I was a horse, you are my hair, Jesus is my water and the Holy Spirit is my carrot. And God set me free, to swim through the acres, into the sun rise, till the stars are at their brightest. Then god puts me away, to lay on my hay, and that makes me cosy. The star light magically catches my rosary as it dangles away, sparkles for the angels, as I lay on my hay.

Shine bright at night diamond earring girl, who reflects light from heavens candles. And subtle stars I wish for you…………x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

Doesn’t this feel like the kind of obscure ramblings you get in the Anthology you have to study for GCSE English? I wrote that the Anthology literature was all about sex in my GCSE English exam. In this case, I would have been right. Oh, and I got an A. Sex sells, people, though possibly not for this guy…

He’s doing pretty well up to the mention of carrots and mold. Though, the diamond earring business only seems to be brought up half way through, with no introduction. I thought he gave her a necklace?!

The Original (unedited)

i am looking for a girl like you answer my message an make my day month year……. an i was with the one with the pure like milk skin, an the red bottle top lips, angel skin angel, you should only drink waters and eat grapes . an she …yes she is the one like oyster coral, she opens her shell so i can feel her pearl, her lips like colorful oysters, open so tonue can catch you girl, yes me… yes i like unicorn, an i am the one like unicorn ,with my eyes to the ground, an my horn to the sky, inline with the moon inorder to feel the pull of your ina exual floods an tieds, an with the power of my horn, i wil pull me an oyster coral, mermaid from the sea, lay with me ,as you do not have feet ,you have flaps an fins , an i will keep you wet , so your fins can breath, belive,….. my home is inheaven , a cloud in the sky, on cloud is a present , a pleasent suprize , a necklace of constelation star, your stars are eternal gliterin for ever , my heart shows external passion humid like desset , come to me my angel fairy girl like sea to river, so we can flow with the wind , on trips to finds star dust a must,….. your hair surfs in the wind in the feild as your hair drops like a rope hanging from heavens her abode, your diamond earings twinkle is the guide house to my yaught , see me not, as my horse has done me well, as we sail into the moon rise, on her back i lay like mould, she swims i hold on to main, though see slept on silver trays on waves , brave , now the stars are at there brightest , an your earing is at its most reflextive , now shine shine angel girl shine with the with moon an stars, an if i was a horse , you are my hair , jesus is my water . an the holyspirit is my carrot an carrot, an god set me frre , to swim through , thee acrees , in to the sun rise, till the stars are at there brightess , then god puts me away , to lay on my hay, an that makes me cosy , the star light magically catchs my rosary, as it dangles away, sparkles for the angels , as i lay on my hay, shine bright at night diamond earring girl, who reflexs light from heavens candles, an suttle stars i wish for you ,…………x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

Fish of the week
JOHN DORY

I know you guys come to this site looking for stuff about PlentyOfFish.com (I check my keywords, I know it’s true) and I don’t provide it nearly often enough. So let’s start a semi-regular feature looking at some of the messages I receive. And who knows, if this goes well, I might even make up some profiles to get more messages.

I am also acutely aware that I give this blog URL to potential employers, mainly because it’s the most mature (in terms of age) blog I run. So, potential employees, focus on the breadth of content, Social Media integration and maybe the loosely defined Digital Marketing category.

I’m not going to reveal any personal details for the potential love interest, I’m not that mean!

First up…

The “Fat Penguin” Guy

Good day – how the devil are you?

Jo you have the most gorgeous smile it lit up my matches screen so I am going to give you the best chat up line I can to try and hook you into a conversation. Are you ready?

“Fat Penguin! (WHAT?) I just wanted to say something that would break the ice.” – it is a classic but I find it works better after a few drinks hahaha! I am hoping that this will not leave me out in the cold!!

Anyway if you fancy messaging me back I’ll try not to make anymore poor jokes! Xxxx

Best chat up line? Try only chat up line. I don’t go for that guff, but even if I did, it takes something away from the humour the fact that he sent me virtually the same message two weeks earlier. I ignored it then, I’m ignoring it again now! Oh and I didn’t included this message to humblebrag, I’m sure he tells all the girls they have ‘the most gorgeous smile.’ *BLOCK USER*

Brief & Unimaginative

hey how are you?

Is that it? His effort and brevity don’t bode well for our sex life. Oh, and locate the shift and comma keys…NEXT!

The Guy I Offended

Even I’ll concede that I could have been a little more friendly to this chap, but I think we all learned something from this conversation:

Him: Hey,

How you finding POF?
Any potential Mr Darcys caught your eye?
What type of guy do you go for?

Tall’ih, dark ‘n handsome, Drives, older (31),
Dresses well, Athletic, lives alones,
Makes great cuppas, Loyal, non needy,
Fun, likes to try new things, Gives good hugs,
Damn it sounds like me!!
…did I mention modesty is my best quality?!

Hope to speak soon

Me: Well, clearly it isn’t going that well or I wouldn’t still be on here. I find it really strange when people ask how I’m finding it. Would you ask someone on a first date who else they’re dating?

If I was messaging someone I was totally in to, would you want me to tell you?

You look cute and I don’t really consider 31 to be older. A lot of my friends are older than that.

I feel like I’m being a little harsh, but hey, I’m honest to a fault.

Him: That’s an awful message in response.
Lacking in originality and ungrateful with it,
I’ve just turned your light out ‘take me out’ style.
…ciao bella literally lol

Me: I’m OK with that. Laters!

Ergh, where to start

• ‘Lol’ is a pet hate of mine.
• I’m not sure it was unoriginal. Hopefully not everyone is going around being as offensive as me on POF.
• Ungrateful? How grateful am I supposed to be for a stock copy and paste message?
• ‘Take me out’ reference – OK, I’ll give that a pass based on the nature of the site.
• What on Earth is ‘Tall’ih?’

That concludes this week’s messages.

I have now changed my location to ‘Nairobi, Kenya,’ which is where I currently am, for real! Don’t believe me, check out my travel blog here!

If you’re selling a house, do a bit of research on your potential estate agents first to pick the one that’s going to be best for you, in terms to selling time and price.

Why we picked our Estate Agent

We selected our Estate Agent based on:

• Being long established
• Knowledge of local area
• We bought the house from him
• He was friend’s with my housemates dad!
• Being the cheapest

These are not the qualities you should be looking for.

What to look for when picking an estate agent

This was the first time I’d sold a house. I really didn’t think there was much difference between one estate agent and another, but I was wrong. Here’s what to look for / ask.

Boards in the area

Check out how many boards there are in the area for different agents and then check which ones are turning from ‘for sale’ to ‘sold.’ These agents with have realistic pricing and the appropriate marketing. If there are properties with more than one board outside them, something’s gone wrong with the first agent. However, some people end up with 2 estate agents because they, as the vendor, have unrealistic expectations on what their property is worth. Remember, you house is only worth what someone is willing to pay for it.

Internet aggregators

Check out sites such as Zoopla and RightMove and have a look at whether or not the estate appears on there. The chances are that they will, so then have a look at some of the properties they are marketing. Are they utilising functionality like featured property, featured agent, highlighting certain properties, etc. These features will cost the agent more, but if they’re willing to sell your house they’ll be will to use these when it needs a push.

Websites

Leading on from the above, check out the estate agent’s website. How searchable is it? How prominent are their contact details? Is it up to date? All these kind of things give you an indication as to how much they understand the importance of online marketing in any property search. If they aren’t making an effort here, I’d question why. Many long established agencies won’t have taken the time to educate themselves on digital marketing. They might be the oldest, but this doesn’t mean best!

Property listings – search results

Specs

Have a look at how good the agent is at writing specs. Think about what people are looking for when they are buying a property and how this information renders online. For example, on property aggregators people will see the first few lines of the spec text in search results (see left). Our agent started off the description by writing about local amenities, but the way people search for properties means they probably already know a lot about the location and are more interested in the house specifics, so all the key, fantastic features should be right at the top of the listing so they are shown in the search results.

We ended up rewriting out whole listing, because we just didn’t feel it sold our property well enough. This didn’t reduce our fees though.

You will also need to consider that it is easy for people to find the purchase price you paid for your house on Zoopla and the market is currently in a slump, so if you’re asking more money than you paid for it, your listing needs to explain what value you’ve added to justify this, such as new bathroom, kitchen, extension, etc.

Realistic Pricing

We got some massively over inflated valuations for our house. We got three opinions and took the middle one, knowing we needed a buffer to negotiate with, but also that we had to fit in a certain bracket on the search listings, i.e. £199,950 was going to fit in the <£200,000 bracket whereas £205,000 was going to push us in to the £210,000 threshold and gain less interest.

It’s wonderful to think your house is worth £20,000 more than you thought and by all means start high and lower the price later, but estate agents with wildly inflated estimations of your property value are just trying to lure you in.

Also, generally don’t go for an agent that wants to market your house with ‘offer in excess of.’ No one really offers more than that figure. All buyers expect to go lower.

What’s not so important…?

And then there are the things that used to be important, but aren’t so much anymore

Local knowledge

People can find out a lot about the local areas from

• The internet
• Driving around them

Don’t ask an estate agent for the best area to live in, because they’re only going to tell you to live in areas that they have properties for sale in.

Geographical area covered

One estate agent tried to convince his that his agency was better because it has more branches from which to market the property. Most people will pick an area and then start their search online. One branch or a hundred really doesn’t make much difference.

Remember, you’re going to be paying these people between 1-2.5% of your house value, make sure they’re going to work hard for you!